


Staring through the window

by Who0psyDaisy



Series: Adventures of the Dumb Cop and her Rat Husband [2]
Category: Epithet Erased (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, Pre-Canon, Tumblr Prompt, meryl is there too i guess, percy is a good cop, police lineup, ramsey is a stinky crime man, she's percys case partner
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2020-01-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:40:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22310425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Who0psyDaisy/pseuds/Who0psyDaisy
Summary: Pre-Epithet Erased Canon:“I, uh… thought you didn’t recognise me?”“I didn’t. Until I saw your epithet. I remember you from a police line-up a few years back. A man came in to report a case of… Golden Buttocks.”“Ah, yeah. Operation Mid-ass.”---Or, Ramsey is caught, and tries to flirt with the detective whilst being escorted to the lineup.
Relationships: Percival "Percy" King/Ramsey Murdoch
Series: Adventures of the Dumb Cop and her Rat Husband [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1591870
Comments: 8
Kudos: 84





	Staring through the window

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lanesy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lanesy/gifts).



> Percy's outfit is based on this!: https://fish-and-ice-arts.tumblr.com/post/190205506406/this-is-kinda-stupid-and-no-one-asked-for-this-but
> 
> I actually wrote this in my notebook on the bus and typed it up from there. that was fun.
> 
> a 211 is the police code for a robbery. I don't know how to do footnotes.

_“I, uh… thought you didn’t recognise me?”_

_“I didn’t. Until I saw your epithet. I remember you from a police line-up a few years back. A man came in to report a case of… Golden Buttocks.”_

_“Ah, yeah. Operation Mid-ass.”_

* * *

Ramsey had gotten caught.

All it took was a small miscalculation on his part, and now he was here.

In a police line-up.

Yeah, he couldn’t see himself getting out of this anytime soon.

Well. To be technical, he was on his way to the line-up, being walked down the hall to the rooms by a short, blonde police officer.

Maybe she was a detective. The ranking system in the Sweet Jazz City Police was. Confusing. To say the least.

He studied her, weighing his options for escape.

Like mentioned before, she had blonde hair, but it was short, and tied back into a scruffily fluffy high ponytail. Her uniform sort of juxtaposed this, as it was crisp, the pale blue still bright as if not yet washed and faded with time.

Her arms swung, poised by her sides, rigidly in sync with her footsteps.

He, in his scraggly old t-shirt and jeans felt underdressed next to her. To be fair, he was trying not to look like a criminal.

No matter. It seemed like she would be a tough one to crack.

They walked down the corridor in silence, the only noise from the click of her dress shoes and the squeaks of his sneakers.

No better time like the present.

“Y’know, if being cute was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged” he gave her a smirk and a wink.

She halted in her step for a split second, before resuming her walk, if only a little more disjointed than before.

Huh.

Okay.

That was interesting.

He tried again.

“Officer, there’s a 211 underway”. No visible reaction. “You’re stealing my heart.”

“I don’t converse with criminal suspects.”

There we go.

“Your cop is showing”

“Good. I am a cop. We are in a police precinct. I’d certainly hope my cop is showing.”

“Ayy okay then, two for two from the boys in blue”

She didn’t reply to that, but her lip twitched slightly upwards.

They came to a stop at a door, to which she pushed down the handle with a click, and opened.

The line-up room.

Oh dear.

Now there was definitely no escape.

“Is that the last one?” a woman with loopy salmon hair leapt up from where she was leaning against the table in the back corner, the furthest away from the one-way window she could possibly be.

The blonde nodded.

“Thank goodness, I was getting so tired of waiting”

“Of course you were” the blonde smiled. It weirdly suited her.

The other woman opened the door to where the other suspects were, gesturing for the rat man to step inside. He complied, out of lack of choice. He briefly wondered if he could take the two officers on.

Probably not. The blonde was small, but she looked mighty.

He studied her as she watched the orange haired woman put him in his place, from her spot safely behind the one-way glass.

She stared right back.

Then in an instant, she clicked a button and she was gone.

Ramsey hoped, that if the universe would be so kind, that he could get out of this unscathed, and that somehow he’d be able to see her again.

A ridiculous wish, really. 

**Author's Note:**

> Original ask by themlim (Lanesy on here, they have really good ramsival and epithet fics!!):  
> Ramsey flirting with Percy at the poilce 3
> 
> Sorry, my cat is being a gremlin. I meant to suggest Ramsey flirting with Percy at the Police Lineup referenced at the end of episode 7.
> 
> Please comment I publish these at night and when I wake up it's like an amazing start to my day. every comment is read and every comment is appreciated.


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